The social nature of many workplaces provides the perfect environment to get to know your co-workers. Between get-togethers every Friday after work with alcohol, food, and possibly music (which leads to dancing) and the softball and volleyball teams, barbeques and pot lucks, there are plenty of opportunities for employees to enjoy each other’s company. HR Solutions’ 2009 National Normative data confirms that 88 percent of all workers strongly feel the people they work with are friendly.
We all spend so much time at work and are often attracted to people who share common interests; it only makes sense that one of these very friendly co-workers is going to eventually jump to the top of your dating to-do list.
When approached properly, workplace dating can benefit organizations by increasing the Engagement levels of those involved. Co-workers are more likely to fall for each other for the following reasons:
- Closeness. People fall in love with co-workers because they are there. The more you are around someone, the more you tend to like them. Close working conditions encourage shared confidences and experiences.
- Convenience. If the average employee works eight to ten hours at the office, sleeps for eight, eats for two, and commutes for two, that leaves between two and four hours to cram in social time. Toss in those compelled to work overtime and weekends and finding someone you want to date becomes a time-consuming, nearly impossible task.
- Community. In a highly mobile society, work is one of the few communities left. College is the only other place individuals are brought together with so many like-minded peers. Trust develops over time. People tend to share hopes, dreams, and troubles with co-workers.
- Compatibility. Individuals tend to work with people who are like themselves in many ways, with similar interests, attitudes, and values. Co-workers have an opportunity to develop romances based on friendship and respect.
- Circumstances. Office romances are especially common in professions where employees are expected to spend long hours together under intense circumstances, and sometimes depend on each other in matters of life and death, such as inside hospitals, police and fire stations, military units, newspaper offices, and law firms.
In effect, dating brings human emotions back into the cubicles of the corporate environment. As the shifting generational groups impact workplace cultures, HR Solutions’ 2009 National Normative data also confirms a rise in employees seeking a work/life balance with 59 percent of workers sharing that their organizations truly support balancing work and personal life, up from 57 percent the previous year.
While the ideal dating situation would be two currently-single peers in two different departments who have very different career paths, organizations rightly fear that dating between co-workers can lead to playing favorites or trigger sexual harassment and fatal attraction-style violence. The fear is that when business talk becomes pillow talk, professional ethics are sacrificed.
Most companies have written policies banning supervisor-subordinate relationships, and enforce them by transferring, demoting, or firing employees who are discovered in such romances. Some companies are asking their employees who date to sign “love contracts”, hoping that documenting the consensual nature of the relationship will mitigate future problems.
Breaking up may be hard to do, but it is even harder in the workplace. There is no such thing as an escape hatch from your cubicle. Breakups bring out the worst in people. This is where charges of sexual harassment can come in, whether real or manufactured. If you believe that the relationship is serious and could lead to a lifetime commitment it might be best for either one of you to change jobs.
Michele Westphall, is a Marketing Project Manger for HR Solutions, Inc.The HR industry´s premier online community and resource for Human Resource professionals: HR, human resources, HR community, human resources community, HR best practices, best practices in human resources, online communities for HR, HR articles, HR news, human resources articles, human resources news, HR events, leadership, performance management, staffing and recruitment, benefits, compensation, staffing, recruitment, workforce acquisition, human capital management, HR management, human resources management, HR metrics and measurement, organizational development, executive coaching, HR law, employment law, labor relations, hiring employees, HR outsourcing, human resources outsourcing, training and development
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